I must first give you all a little bit of back story for this one.
I had a unique experience in January of 2017 when giving birth to my youngest. I had a repeat c-section. The previous one had taken only fifteen minutes and I was in and out of recovery, released from the hospital a few days later. This surgery took more than an hour. The anesthesiologist was pumping drugs straight through my IV to keep me numb, until he reached to maximum he was allowed to give me. I felt a little more than the regular pressures you would feel. My doctor, he requested more muscle assistance to stretch the incision to the appropriate size to retrieve my son from the womb. It was finally over, healthy baby, myself in the recovery room waiting for another room to become available for me to be united with my little one, friends, and family. That evening, we were moved to yet another room, and I WALKED from one room to another. Same day, hours after a spinal epidural and major surgery, I WALKED. After the previous c-section, I was in a wheelchair for thirty-six hours when leaving my hospital room. Walking was not an option for the first twenty-four.
The next morning, they took the catheter out first thing, I mean I was walking the day before, there was no reason to believe I couldn’t make it to the restroom for myself. I was in a lot of pain while trying to maneuver myself to the sitting position on the side of the bed to attempt to go use the facilities that I attributed to having less pain medication in my system than the day before. The pain became near unbearable as I sat there longer. With a walker in front of me for leverage I attempted to stand. . .I honestly thought howling in pain was nothing more than a saying prior to that moment. I howled. The pain was more than excruciating. I was instantly blind, nauseated, and dizzy beyond belief. The nurses helped me back to the laying down position and handed me my poor baby who was howling right along with me. I couldn’t contain my tears. I had no earthly idea what was happening to me. Why couldn’t I walk? I could do it yesterday. How am I supposed to use the bathroom? How am I supposed to feed my baby when I can barely move?
No amount of tests they performed gave them any indication of what was happening. I remained in the hospital being treated by so many different and different kinds of doctors for all kinds of “maybe” scenarios for a week. Upon my release to take y newborn baby home, I was wheeled out to the car where my husband was waiting to bring us home. I lived on the second floor of an apartment building. I crawled up the stairs to get to my two year old at the top who couldn’t understand why his mommy was crawling and a new born baby who was crying and confused. If my mother wouldn’t have been there, I don’t know how I would have made it through the first few days of near immobility at home with a new born.
My mother left, I came up with a routine of my own and a few weeks later my big sister came out to Texas to stay with us and help me for a week because it was still hard for me to accomplish a lot of things on my own.
I went t the doctor about two months after having the baby because I had this lump that didn’t seem to be getting smaller, or shifting back into place like all of my other insides. It appeared to be getting larger. The doctor did an ultrasound to check me out and decided that there was “nothing out of the ordinary” happening here and it would shift in time. I went on with my life. My abdomen hurt all the time. I felt a ripping sensation when I stood up. I sought a second opinion. All she did was look at me and refer me to a surgeon. The surgeon sent me for a ct scan to confirm that I needed to see him. He never got the results from the scan but all he had to do was look at me to know exactly what was wrong with me. I had a ventral hernia in the left side of my abdomen. This type of hernia happens simply from a weak spot in the muscle wall being pushed through. In my case, the weak muscle wall had spawned from not being able to walk after the c-section. I had been unable to do a lot of things that would have helped those muscles to restrengthen after pregnancy the way they should have.
So we knew what was going on at this point. I was in a great deal of pain around the clock because of the pressure and weight of the hernia pulling me forward and to the left constantly. The surgeon then tells me that I am not a candidate for surgery due to my weight. This is why keto.
Finally, February 2nd, 2018, I had lost the fifty pounds required and I was having repair surgery. At this point, I looked as though I were pregnant with twins, only it was a single sided pregnancy. (I try to laugh now.) We were under the impression it would be a four hour outpatient happening. . . that was foolish thinking. After six hours of laborious surgery, the surgeon, as white as a ghost, finds my husband in the waiting room. He informs him that he had placed twenty-seven inches of mesh in my body. He did not look or sound hopeful when he told my husband something along the lines of “I hope this works out for you.” I was inpatient at that point. I stayed in the hospital for a few days and then came home to the care of my dear friends who have put up with so much medical nonsense from me that I am eternally grateful for all that they did and do for me. Danielle brought me home, Alyshia took the next two days, then Missy and her toddler spent the next week here from Florida caring for me and my children. After the first three months I could lift five pounds. Six months gave me the ten pound freedom. it was ten whole months before I was able to hold my baby, not so baby anymore, again.
I am still in recovery a year later. I still wear compression pants to keep the pressure from being too much on those newly developed muscles in my abdomen. There are days that are easier than others. I essentially have been forced to regrow those muscles. Over time it is happening.
I can hold, snuggle, carry, and chase my kiddos around again. Though I must take it easy still, I feel amazing compared to even the day before surgery. The pain is still quite intense at times. I fight back tears a lot. I am just happy to be alive and able to do the things that a year ago, when I was told twenty-seven inches, I didn’t believe I would be able to do ever again. Though I will forever feel certain things differently and probably have some pains that will travel with me through my life because of the amount of foreign object in there, I’m here and recovery is HARD!
A shout-out to the incredible surgeon! He gave me back to my family, gave me my life back, and gave me hope for a full recovery one day.
